PaulCoulstring

Paul Coulstring

Circa 1981. Photo by RandyMoore

October 9, 1949 - January 30, 19911

Paul Arthur Coulstring

• Parents: Harold Bligh Coulstring and Blanche Marjorie Moore
• Sister: Sandra Mary Bjarnason (b Coulstring) (died 1999)
• Profession: elementary school teacher and owner of Surfside Inn B and B, Queensland
• School: Queen Elizabeth High School
• University: Dalhousie
• Fraternity: Phi Delta Theta

Died in Halifax, January 30, 1991, from complications from AIDS.

Randy Moore writes:

He was cremated but never interred to my knowledge. The ashes were given to his partner, Ron Allain, and I never knew what happened to them.

Paul's mother died when he was 6 years old. His father eventually remarried, but it wasn't a good match for the kids. First his sister Sandra, followed by Paul, moved in with their Uncle Robie and his wife, Edith. Robie was the youngest sibling of Paul's mother. They each stayed there for several years, and Paul was there into his university years.

Paul frequented a gay bar in the Green Lantern building, and TheHeidelberg Restaurant, which was known to have a gay following, usually after the other bars closed. He also used to mention about going to the Cameo Restaurant which was also known to have a gay following.

Paul used to host the most wonderful parties, including his famous Pot-Luck dinners.2

Circle of friends: Ron Roach (his bestie!), Dr Greg Roy, DrBruceElliott , Rick Hartnett, GraemeEllis and BobMcKay, Patricia Gates.

I loved him dearly. He lived with us when I was little and I looked up to him more like a brother than a cousin. We lost touch for many years until I ended up doing practice teaching at his school and we reconnected as I was coming out. He was very much my fairy Godmother! LOL barely a day goes by that I don't think of him. He was certainly one of a kind! But I know for a fact that he died with no regrets. He was always the belle of the ball!

Does High School Matter?

StephenKimber? writes in the August 30, 2007 TheCoast, Does high school matter?3:

Ah, yes, Paul Coulstring… I remember Paul too. He was funny, fun-loving, a better dresser than most of us, a good dancer too. There was invariably a gaggle of girls around him.

It isn't just that I didn't realize he was gay at the time; the thought didn't occur to me. I clearly knew there were homosexuals, I just never imagined I actually knew someone who was gay. I can't imagine now how difficult it must have been for Paul—and for others too—to hide that part of themselves from the world.

Although Paul went on to serve as a Halifax school teacher for 18 years—since he was one of my older son's favourite teachers, inspiring his love of English, I probably exchanged pleasantries with him at occasional parent-teacher functions—I only finally realized Paul was gay when I read his obituary in the newspaper. It was 1991. The newspaper didn't mention homosexuality or AIDS, of course, but by then I could read between the lines of his "longtime companion Ron" and the fact that donations could be made to the VG Hospital's hospice memorial fund. Paul was 42.

He was not the only one to die before his time, not even the only member of my Class of '67 to die of AIDS-related causes.